【黑与白】坏人们||颜艾琳:终于还是错过那些未发生的历史
终于还是错过那些未发生的历史
作者:颜艾琳
翻译:奚密(Michelle Yeh)
谜
谁的宇宙已生成?
谁拥有这神秘的膨胀?
你是谁?
而某人已拥有你?
或是一齣悲剧的谋和?
你说:「我还不知道我是谁?」
某人回答:「你已经是我的。」
生命是无知而来,
朝未知而去。
谁都知道
其实
你和自己的影子
在跳舞。
2017.4月初稿 5.8二稿6.13三稿 7.9定稿
A Riddle
Whose universe was born?
Who orders this inexplicable expansion?
Who are you?
And you already belong to someone?
Or is this all a tragedy reconciled?
I don’t know who I am yet, you say
But you are mine, someone answers
Life starts from ignorance
And is headed to ignorance
Everyone knows
The fact is
You are partying with
Your own shadow
——Translated by Yanwing Leung
太极行星
「亲爱的,我从不认為……」
你那水蛭一般的舌头
已经吸食了我的言语、并
进入我深奥的体内,
去挖掘尚未说出的情偈。
我们的外在,是世纪末
颓废鲜明的都会迷彩,
但,肉体的内涵
则退化為原始慾望的火山期。
灵魂是一门形而上的哲学;
而血肉构成的你我
是另一种五行运转的小宇宙。
你不要我思辩下去,
开始在我的血液裡
养殖一窝蚂蚁
唾解我囤积一生的甜言蜜语。
是的,
当亚当初次舔舐夏娃的身体,
一定也明白这个道理;
最激情的行星撞击,
即是一男一女
危险又甜蜜的阴阳互嵌。
The Planets of the Supreme Ultimate
“My dear, I had never thought …”
that leech-like tongue of yours
has already sucked in my words, and
entered the deep recess of my body
to excavate the unspoken gatha of my love.
Our externality is the urban camouflage
of decadence all too plain of the fin-de –siècle,
but the implication of the flesh
has degenerated into a volcanic period of primitive desires.
Soul is a subiect of metaphysics;
but you and I, composed of flesh and blood,
are another kind of microcosm where
the five elements are at work.
You don’t want me to keep on speculating
and nest of ants to dissolve with their saliva
the sweet words and honeyed phrases I stored up in life.
when Adam licked Eve’s body for the first time
surely, too, eh knew the truth;
the most passionate collision of planets
is nothing other than a man and a woman
dangerously and sweetly dovetailed yin with yang.
——Translated by Chu Chiyu-杜国清and Brian Holton
[Translators’ note : The poet evidently refers to the Diagram of the Supreme Ultimate, composed by the philosopher Zhou Dunyi (1017-73), by which Zhou attributed the production of the universe to the working of the five elements, derived the five elements from the alternation of yin and yang, and explained yin and yang as the alternating quiescence and movement of the Supreme Ultimate. See Derk Bodde, trans. A History of the Chinese Philosophy, by Fung Yu-lan, Vol.2 (Princeton University Press, 1953), pp.435 ff.]
Selected from the special issue in “Nüren de hupo: Tai-wan nüxing wenxue yü wenhua” (II) [Women and Lakes: Women’s Literature and Culture in Taiwan]. Chung-wai Wen-hsüeh [Chinese-Foreign Literature Monthly], No. 313, June 1998, pp. 152-54.
乡愁刑
像农人插秧一样,
我将故乡种植在舌根上,
藉著语言传播
她绿色的风景、
老旧的红砖瓦厝、
前人祖先的事蹟。
那曾经灌溉过
无数农田的水流,
如今自我心臟的水坝復活,
流动著生命的文字
注入一畦一畦的纸张;
让眾人看见
大肆氾滥的乡愁,
如何冲刷攀附在我身上的
都会鳞片?霓虹顏料?
一吐舌,
泥土的香腥味
捲著玉米、蕃薯、龙眼、芒果
稻米、桂花、文旦、芭乐的气息
再次将自己催眠。
「我们回到了家乡」。
彼时,乡愁尚未打造成
銬绑游子的刑具;
我们在嘉南平原
绿色的牢笼中
快乐地服监。
The Penalty of Homesickness
Like farmers transplanting rice shoots,
I planted my hometown on my tongue,
and use language to publish
its green scenery,
its old house with red bricks and tiles,
and the deeds of its forefathers and ancestors.
The water flow that used to irrigate
countless rice paddies
has now revived in the dam of my heart,
flows with words of life
and pours onto fields of writing paper;
It lets everybody see
how unrestrained homesickness flooding washes away the
remnants clinging to my body
of urban scaliness? Of neon coloration?
Once I stick out my tongue,
the fragrances and rankness of the soil
gather in the exhalations of corn, sweet potato, lingan, mango,
rice, osmanthus flowers, pomelo, and guava
and once again lull me to sleep.
‘We have returned to our hometown.’
At that time, homesickness and not been wrought into
an instrument for torturing the wanderer;
we were on the Chianan Plain,
held in a verdant cage
happily serving a term in jail
——Translated by Chu Chiyu-杜国清and Brian Holton
我和那人之间的不可告密
那人之前悄悄地来了,
打开我的身体
偷了最珍贵的密藏,
还厚著脸皮邀我共享一切。
那人有著极大的祕密。
生长著嘴唇
却不言语;
想借我的声带播出,
但我无法测知他的奥义,
只能乾呕出莫名的单字。
那人如此宁静,
明明偷取我的身体,
藉此不断成长著;
啜饮我的血液
窃听我体内的涛音,
但,
他不著一语。
对我不予置评。
那人微小而又将巨大,
不停地巨大,
偷偷换取我的光阴
追赶我离去甚远的童年、
少年、
乃至我的现在。
他不懂谦虚地
快速成长........
那人是二十九年前的我。
而今,我有了那人。
那人其实来自另一个宇宙,
却成为我的一部份;
完全不可告密的
奇蹟。
The Unspeakable Secret between Me and That Man
Early on that man came without a sound
Opened my body
Stole my most precious hidden treasure
Then shamelessly invited me to share it
That man harbored a great secret
Lips growing
That would not speak
He tried to borrow my vocal cord to express
The mystery that I could not fathom
I only coughed out some unintelligible syllables
That man was so calm
He openly pilfered my body
Through which he kept on growing
He drank my blood
Eavesdropped on my ebb and flow
Yet
He spoke no word
Made no comment on me
That man was puny but giant
He got bigger and bigger
Stole away my days and nights
Chased after my long-gone childhood
Adolescence
Even my present
He grew immodestly
And rapidly…
That man is me twenty-nine years ago
Now I own him
He came from another universe
But has become part of me
A wholly unspeakable
Miracle
终于
终于知道
有些人是得不到的
像在半路寄丢的神秘礼物
只留一张错误的挂号通知单
终于知道
他是深深爱你的
但他却像生命中
误存的一大笔财产
你毫不在乎的那些「0」
是他心血的亿万
你随手抛弃的铜板
终于知道
不得理解的某些事
就像康熙字典裡的古字
有其简单的道理
但有人偏偏用了这难懂的符号
使它成为谜题
终于说了不该说的话
真实替代假面;
终于被人知道
长久说谎的那人
比较慈善恭良
比较亲切 是个好人
终于还是这样
错过想写的一首诗
错过城隍庙的籤诗
以致和第二个人认识
和第七个人恋爱
和最后的陌生人结婚
错过和总统的婚外情
错过和超级明星的诽闻
错过和欧兰朵做爱的夜晚
错生一个性别倒错的
三岛.佛洛依德.吴尔芙.达利
终于看见整个人生
遇见了这些人
发生一些事情
而从没遇见的那些人
终于还是错过那些未发生的历史
我该不会是错过
整个原来应该有的
另一种人生吧
At Last
At last I realize
Some people you simply can't have
Like a mysterious gift lost in the mail
Leaving behind a fortuitous registration slip
At last I know
He did love me deeply
But he was a huge fortune deposited by mistake
Those zeros meant nothing to him
Billions of hard-earned dollars
Were thrown away casually like coins
At last I understand
Those incomprehensible events
Are like archaic words in the Kangxi Dictionary
They are simple in principle
But expressed in arcane symbols
Turning into riddles
At last I said something I shouldn't have
Honesty replaces falsehood
At last people discover
The one who has seemed bad
Is a good person
Kinder more modest more loving
At last nothing changes
I missed a poem I meant to write
Missed a divinatory verse at the local shrine
As a result I met the second guy
Fell in love with the seventh guy
And married a total stranger
I missed an affair with the president
A scandal involving a superstar
I missed a night of lovemaking with Orlando
And giving birth to a gender-confused
Mishima, Freud, Woolf, Dali
At last I have seen all of life
Have met these people
Experienced certain things
But having never met those people
I missed the history of that which never happened
Have I missed
A whole other life
That should have been?
安娜琪的房子
Ⅰ.
没有声音的时候,镜子反刍骚动的记忆。
任性的女主人搭配不同体味的情侣
彼此品嚐肉体的生猛快感
那时,因为出狎的情慾
所有的家具都变成野兽,
在黏浊的暗中,以盯著猎物的狩姿窥伺
不断支配或被支配的、
不断满足或遗憾的、
不断温柔或激进的、
安娜琪与她的政治游戏。
Ⅱ.
安娜琪没有声音的时候,
房子对声音就开始消化不良。
不准有朋友或仇人前来按暴躁的门铃
不准大哥大江湖式的召唤
不准B B Call私家侦探的密码跟催
不准电话小女人似的唧唧切切.....
最后房子对安娜琪的心跳声
也没有办法承受了。
天黑之后,房子暂时休克过去,
家具和鲜花一併昏迷。
在黑暗中,瀰漫著
另一种泛政治化的恐惧
Ⅲ.
有声音的时候,安娜琪的生活是热闹的。
午后的咖啡和奶精
演绎著和解的氛围、
雪茄跟凉菸在菸灰缸裡
交换吐纳的肺腑之言、
口红和槟榔汁
烙在盛红酒的杯缘上攀关係;
她的Party如此公开,
却佐以窃窃私语的小菜,
引人开胃,进而
无所不啖权力的主菜。
声音在消失之前
来自四面八方的饕客
都被安娜琪的招待
满足了每一张嘴。
Ⅳ.
房子充满安娜琪的灵魂。
安娜琪多麽双性。
一个人的安娜琪和她(他)自己的安娜琪
妥协了这个孤立的房子。
The House of Anarchy
I.
When there's no sound, mirrors regurgitate tumultuous memories
The willful lady of the house chooses lovers with different body odors
Savoring the raw ferocious pleasure of each other's body
When let out of the cage, desire
Turns all the furniture into wild animals
In the heavy sticky darkness, they peer at their prey
To control or be controlled without end
To be satisfied or to regret without end
To be tender or aggressive without end
Anarchy and her game of politics
II.
When Anarchy is quiet
The house develops indigestion toward sound
It allows no friend or foe to ring the cranky doorbell
No beckoning from mobile phones
No tracking beepers in the code of private detectives
No phone calls like chatty little women…
In the end the house can't even stand
The sound of Anarchy's heart beating
After dark the house passes out in shock
Along with the fainted furniture and fresh flowers
In the dark
A fear of overt politicization permeates
III.
When there is sound, Anarchy's life comes alive
In the afternoon coffee and cream
Illustrate an ambiance of reconciliation
Cigars and menthol cigarettes in the ashtray
Exchange words from the bottom of their hearts
Lipstick and beetle juice network
Leaving imprints on the rim of a glass of red wine
Her party is open to all
Serving hors d'oeuvre of whispers
To whet appetite, followed by
The power-hungry main course
Before the sound disappears
The gluttons coming from all corners
Are satiated
By Anarchy's hospitality
IV.
The house teems with the soul of Anarchy
The androgynous Anarchy
One person's Anarchy and her/his own Anarchy
Find compromise in this lonely house
句点
我出现在梦土上。
梦境不断缩小,
我侷促地来回踱步;
越走越急、越走
越没有版图。
当梦小到成为一个句点
那麽小,
我也消失了。
Period
I appear on the land of dreams
The land begins to shrink
I pace back and forth
The more anxious I get
The smaller the area becomes
When the dream shrinks to a dot
As small as a period
I too disappear
少女的果实
时间在十六岁变慢,
似乎要将少女酝酿成
一种温柔的季节;
让日落更迟缓、
让秒针走得更果断,
少女的眼眸有雾出入,
某种无法透彻的单纯,
由诗人强以诠释。
于是有魔力的蓓蕾,
一次次在少女胸前绽放,
而我们俗称为:
B罩杯。
The Fruit of a Teenage Girl
At the age of sixteen time slows down
As if to allow a teenage girl to mature
Into a season of tenderness
It makes the sun set at an easier pace
Makes the second hand tick more resolutely
Fog drifts in and out of her eyes
An inscrutable innocence
Waits for a poet's interpretation
Then a rosebud with magical power
Blooms on her bosom
In colloquial term
We call it B Cup
瓶中苹果
是谁将苹果
种在我的体内?
每月每月,
它成熟著果实
沉沉落底在子宫中,
而我感觉滞重、晕眩
仿彿有什麽即将发生。
是谁赋予我敏锐的
生理天秤?
那苹果熟致腐烂
化为稠汁,
并且愤怒地、快速地
往下坠落
离开我的身体。
我的天秤,感觉
一个小小的宇宙,
死亡。
然后 恢复无物。
那苹果仅留一籽,
以结实的眼泪型态
悬于我幽密的花瓶,
之中。
Apple in a Vase
(Translated by Chu Chiyu and Brian Holton )
who planted the apple
in my body?
month by month,
ripening with fruit
heavily falling into the depth of my womb,
I feel heavy, dizzy
as if something is going to happen.
who granted me these sharp
scales of physiology?
the apple is ripe, rotting
into thick fluid,
and angrily, speedily
sinking down
leaving my body.
my scales, feeling
this tiny universe,
feel death.
then nothingness restored.
the apple has only one pip left,
with a solid tear-drop shape
hanging,
in my dark secret vase.
他方
一公里以外的火车站
从未去过的异地
传说盛产婴儿
每次列车经过
他们的哭声
穿过迂迴的巷道
传到我的耳边
有一日,
也许我会过去看看
那些婴儿的父母
疲倦而慈爱的笑容。
然后踏上小小的火车站
到宁静的南方
生产我的婴孩。
Yonder(Ta fang)
The train-station a mile from here
An alien land I've never been to
Well-known for babies, so they say
Every time the train passes by
The babies' crying
Reaches my ears
Through winding lanes
Someday
I think I'll go to look up
The parents of the babies
See their tired but loving smiles
Then step on the tiny platform at the station
Travel to the peaceful south
To give birth to my baby.
作者简介
颜艾琳,台湾台南人,1968年出生,辅仁大学历史系毕。年轻时玩过摇滚乐团、剧场、地下刊物。曾获出版优秀青年奖、创世纪诗刊40周年优选诗作奖、全国优秀诗人奖、吴浊流新诗正奖、中国文艺文学类新诗奖章。著有《骨皮肉》、《黑暗温泉》、《她方》、《微美》、《诗乐翩篇》、《A赢的地味》十几本书;诗作已译成英、法、韩、日文等,被选入各种国语文教材,并被改编为流行歌、民谣、微电影、广告、舞台剧、现代舞、小剧场等。
坏人榜
【黑与白]|梁永利|布客|贾虫|李荼|童七|百定安|闫殿才|李鑫|罗官员|苏仁聪|曹忠胜|拉萨|蓝弧|荆棘草|白丢丢|严小妖|毕俊厚||苏醒|侯文基|丁不三|李文武|赵大爷|鐡包金|后后井|陈衍强|赵小北|吕历|山鸿|吴玉垒|聆听流年|忧子|阿剑|阿玛多吉|王文雪|鹤轩|阿登|刀把五|李栋|胖荣|王小拧|田力|乌鸦丁|向以鲜|谭昌永|李不嫁|辛夷|陳潤生|吴友财||喻言|林水文|马德刚|薄小凉|黄小线|李树侠|离开|梁兄|子尹|而己|蔺正勇|慕白|梅娜|蔡四梅|龙洋|江不离|天晴了|黄药师|呆呆|王海云|天岩|雪野|卜子托塔|琉璃姬|
【投稿须知】
(1)发自己满意作品到指定邮箱:2416478757@qq.com,欢迎不同风格的诗,来稿附上简介、照片和微信号,均附件发送。来稿两周内未见釆用,作者另行处理。
(2)来稿发布后涉及纠纷,文责自负。本公号推文均已获作者授权,图片来自网络,版权属原作者。
(3)投稿者建议关注公众号,推送后取消自由,无妨。
诗天府
长按扫码关注我们
编辑 土土儿